Gutekerereza mugenzi wawe- niyo ntandaro y’ubwumvikane buke n’amakimbirane mu rushako, mu rukundo no mu mibanire yawe n’abandi

HAKIZIMANA Maurice

IBIBAZO byinshi mu rushako, mu rukundo, mu miryango no mu mibanire y’abantu biva mu kumva nabi ibintu, no mu gutekerereza mugenzi wawe, mu kwibwira ibyo ashatse kuvuga atavuze, icyo ibyo akoze bisobanura,cyangwa icyo ashobora kuba arimo gutekereza ! Iyo rero ufashe umwanzuro ushingiye ku byo wowe wibwira kuri mugenzi wawe,utabanje kumva icyo we abivugaho mu buryo butomoye (busobanutse), nibwo utangira gushushanya ibintu bishobora no kwangiza umubano wanyu. Utangira guhimba ibintu no kwibwira icyo wowe wakora mu mimerere ye (ibyo twita “projection” mu gifaransa) : Wireba mu ndorerwamo y’ibitekerezo byawe bwite, ibyo ubonye ukabitwerera mugenzi wawe, maze ugaca urubanza,ukarusoma, ukanakora irangizarubanza we atazi iyo biva n’iyo bijya.

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Dutangira guhimbahimba ibinyoma mu mitima yacu no mu bitekerezo byacu, amashusho mpimbano yuje ubwoba no gushidikanya kuri bagenzi bacu, nta na rimwe dukora mashusho ashingiye ku rukundo n’icyizere. Usanga akantu kose kabaye tugasesengura tukakavanamo ishusho ishingiye ku byo twe twagakoze turi mu mwanya we nyamara burya b’iyo yaba uwo mwashakanye munamaranye imyaka myinshi, ntushobora kwishyira mu mwanya we mu buryo butunganye. Ntitwavukanye, ntitwashaririwe n’ibyamubayeho mu buzima byose, ibikomere bye n’uburibwe bimutera wabikeka gusa ariko ntiwabyiyumvisha nkawe, kandi intege nke cyangwa imbaraga ntiwazipima keretse ubanje kuba we ukabona kugaruka ukaba wowe. Ubwo rero kwinaniza wibwira ibyo undi atekereza cyangwa ibyo ashobora kuba ateganya gukora mu rukundo rwanyu cyangwa mu mibanire yanyu cyangwa se mu mishyikirano mugirana, ni ukwivunira ubusa.Wibuke ko mu rukundo nyarukundo hatabamo gukekana amababa no gucirirana imanza.

Ubwoba bwinshi abantu bagira buba bushingiye ku bintu bitari ukuri kandi bitazigera bibaho na rimwe cyangwa bizabaho kera cyane kurusha uko wabitekerezaga.

None se ni incuro zingahe wabanje kubaza nyirubwite icyo yashakaga kuvuga? Ese igihe wamusabaga kugusubiriramo ibyo yavuze cyangwa kubisobanura, ntiwasanze incuro nyinshi wari wamwumvise nabi?

Nyamara si kenshi abantu babanza gusaba nyirubwite gusubiramo ibyo yavuze cyangwa gusobanura mbere yo kubitwara uko, mbere yo kwirakaza cyangwa mbere yo kwishushanyiriza! Impamvu batigora babaza ibibazo nyirubwite ni uko baba batinya ibisubizo bari buhabwe.Nyamara ibyo bisubizo utinya guhabwa nibyo kuri, nibyo bigufasha kumva no gusobanukirwa mugenzi wawe, nibyo bituma wumva neza icyo yavuze, icyo yashakaga kuvuga, cyangwa icyo imyitwarire ye ivuga.

Dore icyo ukwiriye gukora

• Ese ukeka ko mugenzi wawe yakurakariye ? Bimubaze weruye. 
• Ese ukeka ko atagikunda nka mbere ? Mwegere ubimubaze! 
• Ese ukeka ko uko witwaye, ibyo wavuze, ibyo wanditse,… byamushenguye umutima? Mubaze weruye maze umenye niba ari byo koko cyangwa niba ari ibyo wibwiraga gusa.

Emera ko  ibyinshi mu byo twibwira biba atari ukuri ahubwo biba bishingiye ku bwoba budafite ishingiro no ku gukekana amababa gusa ! Ntuzigere wongera kwitiranya ibyo wibwira muri wowe, amashusho wicuriye mu mutwe wawe, n’amarangamutima wihangiye n’ukuri kw’impamo. Mu rwego rwo kumenya impamo y’ibintu mbere yo kwirakaza no gufata umwanzuro uhubukiweho, jya ugira ubutwari bwo kubaza nyirubwite ibibazo bihamya niba ufite ukuri cyangw aniba wibeshya. Gutekerereza mugenzi wawe-niyo ntandaro y’ubwumvikane buke n’amakimbirane mu rushako, mu rukundo no mu mibanire yawe n’abandi

Iyi si,

HAKIZIMANA Maurice II Kunkurikira kuri Whatsapp https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VaCyM5ILdQejDYwQ2b2 II Kunkurikira kuri facebook: https://www.facebook.com/professormaurice/.