IMIBANIRE MYIZA N'IKINYABUPFURA UMUCO-AGAHUGU UMUCO AKANDI UWUNDI

DORE AMAHAME MBWIRIZAMUCO ATANDITSE ARANGA UMUNTU WIYUBAHA.NAWE UBISHATSE WAKWIYUBAHA,ABANDI NABO BAKAKUBAHA.

May 28, 2023
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HAKIZIMANA Maurice

UMUNTU WIYUBASHYE: wasobanura ute umuntu wiyubashye? Iyo bavuze ngo runaka ariyubaha,ni iki gihita kiza mu bwenge bwawe? Ni ayahe mahame mbwirizamuco ikiremwamuntu gifatiraho kumenya umugabo cyangwa umugore wiyubaha muri sosiyeti abamo? Hano ndagusangiza ibintu 15 muri byo, kuko iyo wiyubaha ubwawe,nibwo n’abandi bakubaha.

1. Umuntu wiyubaha ntasabiriza: n’ubwo rimwe na rimwe dukenera ubufasha bw’abandi,ariko mu bantu bose, mu mico yose,nta we ukunda umuntu usega,usabiriza.Umuntu usabiriza aba yisuzuguza kandi koko arasuzugurwa uko yaba asa kose.Ahubwo ba mu bantu badatunzwe no gusaba,ahubwo bafasha abandi bari mu kaga igihe bibaye ngombwa.

2. Umuntu wiyubaha ntiyiruka inyuma y’abatamushaka,ntahatiriza: n’ubwo dushobora kwinginga rimwe cyangwa kabiri mu buzima,ariko umuntu wihambira k’utamushaka,ku bamaze kumuhakanira,ku bamwiyamye,aba yisuzuguza kandi n’abandi baramusuzugura.Ni nako bigenda kuri telefoni,guhamagara umuntu incuro 5,10,20 zose ni ukutiyubaha.Rimwe cyangwa kabiri birahagije,niba atakwitabye,hari impamvu,niba ahuze araza kuguhamagara. Guhatiriza ugakabya si ukwiyubaha.

3. Umuntu wiyubaha ntahoza akarenge mu ngo z’incuti ze,mu ngo z’abaturanyi be: n’ubwo “ifuni ibagara ubucuti ari akarenge” , ariko burya urabagara ukarekera aho ugaha amahoro imyaka wabagariye, ntuhozamo ifuni. Guhora wikurura mu rugo rw’abandi,ukicara yo bagateka ukarya ukabigira kenshi,si ukwiyubaha,uba wisuzuguza kandi koko baragusuzugura cyane,n’ubwo batabikubwira.

4. Umuntu wiyubaha ntavumba,ntataha ubukwe batamutumiyemo: Kuvumba si umuco w’abantu biyubaha; hari impamvu utatumiwe mu birori by’abandi,kabone n’iyo baba incuti zawe: wenda hari ibyicaro bike,wenda hari ibyo kwakiriza abashyitsi bake, wenda ibyo birori bireba abantu bake. Kwitumira mu birori utatumiwemo si ukwiyubaha;ni ukwisuzuguza,kandi koko bakuryanira inzara,bagatakaza icyubahiro baguhaga uwo waba uri we wese,akazi waba ukora kose.

Ahubwo niba koko ufite ku mutima abo bageni,cyangwa abakoze ikirori runaka,boherereze impano n’agakarita(akandiko) ubifuriza kuryoherwa unababwira ko wifatanyije nabo muri ibyo byishimo barimo. Aho ho,uzibukwa mu bantu biyubaha,biyubashye.

5. Umuntu wiyubaha iyo yatumiwe mu birori no mu bukwe ntiyiyicaza aho batamweretse kandi ntategereza kwibutswa gutaha: Iyo wiyicaje mu myanya y’imbere iteka birangira ukojejwe isoni,kuko iyo haje ukurusha icyubahiro baguhagurutsa bose babireba ugatakaza cya cyubahiro waharaniraga.Ariko iyo wiyicariye iyoooo inyumaaaa,muri rubanda,hanyuma abateguye ikirori bakakurembuza bakwereka aho baguteguriye mu myanya y’imbere,utambukana icyubahiro kandi ni byo byiza.Mu gutaha,jya umenya gusezera hakiri kare cyane,utahe hakibona,aho kukwibutsa ko bashaka kwanura intebe.

6. Umuntu wiyubaha ajya mu bukwe no mu birori yariye,ntajyana inzara mu birori by’abandi:indi ngingo ni inzara abantu batiyubaha bajyana mu birori,bakacuranwa umuceri n’inyama,ibirayi byanyuze mu mavuta,bakanywa inzoga nk’abataziheruka, bagasakabaka bahamagara ba bakobwa batambagiza ibiryo n’ibinyobwa.Burya uba ugaragaye.Uhatakariza icyubahiro niba hari n’icyo wari usigaranye.

7. Umuntu wiyubaha avuga make: Burya iyo n’umunyabwenge buke yicecekeye, akavuga make,abantu baramwubaha. Mu bigambo byinshi niho icyubahiro gitakarira. Jya wifata mu byo uvugira mu ruhame,vuga make,kandi ya ngombwa gusa. Ibi kandi bireba n’ibyo tuvugira mu nyandiko: ibyo wandika ku mbuga nkoranyambaga,za komanteri utanga nyinshi cyane utanagenzura,akenshi wisama wasandaye,wamaze gutakaza icyubahiro cyawe. Aha ariko simvuga ku bantu bavuga ibyubaka,ibintu baba bagenzuye,ibintu babanza gutekerezaho. Hari abantu b’abanyacyubahiro benshi batakaje ibyubahiro byabo kubera amagambo bavuga batabanje gukaraga ururimi rwabo mu kanwa incuro zirindwi. Iyo ubaye “Bavugirije” utakaza icyubahiro,kandi ugasuzugurwa.

8. Umuntu wiyubaha ntarya abandi imitsi: umuntu wiyubaha akoresha amaboko ye(cyangwa amaguru ye,cyangwa umutwe we) akitunga,akarya ibivuye mu cyuya cye (igihe cyose abishoboye) aho gutegereza ko abandi ari bo bamuha byose. Iyo ukora,nta pfunwe ryo kurya no kunywa iby’incuti zawe zagutumiyemo kuko ziba zizi ko atari zo zikugize,kandi ko ejo n’ejo bundi nazo zizaza kurya ibyawe. Nibwo buzima,niko kamere muntu yubatse. Iyo abantu bazi ko ubarya imitsi gusa,ko bo ntacyo bakuryaho,ko nta kikuvaho,bagutakariza icyubahiro,ntuba wiyubaha.

9. Umuntu wiyubaha iyo asuzuguwe,atutswe,arabisuzugura: Iyo utangiye gusubizanya n’ugututse wese, cyangwa ugusuzuguye mu ruhame,uba urimo kwimanura hasi,wisuzuguza. Suzugura agasuzuguro kose n’ibitutsi byose,ukomeze wigendere,nugera aho utuje,urebe icyo gukora kugira ngo ukosore abakwibeshyeho niba biri mu bushobozi bwawe. Ariko ntukaryame ngo usinzire uterere iyo mu gihe hari ikizinga bari gushyira ku izina ryawe;gira icyo ukora ariko utuje cyane,ucecetse.Abantu basubizanya n’ibihita byose batakarizwa icyubahiro,ntibaba biyubaha,abandi nabo ntibabubaha.

10. Umuntu wiyubaha yambara neza,akagira isuku: Ku bagabo,iyo uconga neza ubwanwa bwawe,ukogosha neza umusatsi wawe, moustache (niba ihari) igacongwa, ukambara ishati nziza imeshe,igoroye, ipantalo ukayambarira aho igomba kwambarirwa, kandi ugasukura ibirato byawe,ari nako woza amenyo ukita no ku mpumuro yawe,uba wiyubaha. Abandi barakubaha.

Ku bagore,iyo wita ku musatsi wawe,ukita ku mpumuro yawe,ukambara imyenda ikwiranye n’ibyo urimo,ukirinda ko abandi bagufata uko utari bitewe n’imyambarire ikwambika ubusa, burya barakubaha. Iyo utika ku isuku,imyambarire n’imyirimbishirize yawe,ntuba wiyubaha,kandi abandi baragusuzugura.

11.Umuntu wiyubaha yirinda amazimwe no gusebanya: iyo hagize umuzanira amagambo y’amazimwe,ubujajwa,gusebanya no guteranya abavandimwe n’incuti,ahita abihagarikira aho wenda yiyama uyamugemuriye,cyangwa amukosora mu mvugo nk’izi ngo: none se ayo magambo ushaka kumbwira arubaka?ni ingirakamaro?ni ukuri?nimara kuyumva se,aragira izihe ngaruka? Ni uko ukamusaba kuyigumanira no kutazongera kumugemurira bene ayo magambo ya “munyangire” na “mfasha tumwange”! Umuntu ukwirakwiza amazimwe atakarizwa icyubahiro,arasuzugurwa.

12.Umuntu wiyubaha yubahiriza igihe: iyo ahawe gahunda/rendez-vous (appointment) agerageza iteka kuyubahiriza kandi iyo hagize impamvu itamuturutseho itumye gahunda itagenda neza yibuka guhamagara uwari umutegereje bakavugana niba babonana mu minota yigiye imbere,nku yindi saha bavuganye,cyangwa ku wundi munsi.Umuntu uhabwa gahunda ya saa yine akahagera saa tanu n’iminota mirongo itatu n’ibiri,ntiyiyubaha,kandi iyo babaho kenshi bamuryaniranira inzara uwo yaba ari we wese.

13.Umuntu wiyubaha yubaha abantu bose: ntasuzugura abazamu,abasekirite,abakozi bo mu rugo,abatagisimani,abamotari,abapangayi bari mu mazu ye,abakozi akoresha ku kazi,abazunguzayi, n’abandi bantu bose abandi babona nk’abasuzuguritse. Aramutsa abana be,n’uwo bashakanye,ntiyigira intare mu rugo,aramutsa abaturanyi,kandi akarangwa no kumwenyurira bose. Ntawe ahutaza yitwaje ko akomeye. Udakora ibyo ntiyubahwa,ahubwo avumirwa ku gahera,arasuzugurwa.

14.Umuntu wiyubaha yirinda kwiyandarika n’ubusinzi:N’ubwo waba unywa kuri ka divayi,iyo wiyubaha wirinda kunywa nyinshi kugira ngo zitakugaragurira mu ruhame ugakorwa n’isoni,cyangwa ukavuga ibyo utari ukwiriye kuvuga.Nanone,n’ubwo waba ushaka gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina,umuntu wiyubaha,ntayikorera ku karubanda,mu gihuru,mu bizu bitagira abantu,mu kabari,n’ahandi.Agomba gutandukana n’inyamaswa izi zisanzwe,kabone n’iyo uwo babikorana yaba ari uwo bashakanye bizwi na bose.Umuntu wese utagira ubuzima bwite ntaba yiyubaha;kandi n’abandi ntibamwubaha.

15.Umuntu wiyubaha avugisha ukuri,ntarimanganya,yishura amadeni ku gihe: Niba ushaka kwiyubaha no kubahwa,jya ubwiza ukuri bagenzi bawe: niba ari ideni umuhaye,mubyumvikaneho,niba ari isezerano utanze,uryubahirize,niba ari itariki utanze yo kwishyuriraho uwagukopye cyangwa uwakugurije, ntuyirenze ngo winumire,niba utabashije kubahiriza amasezerano ntugategereze ko bayakwishyuza, ahubwo fata iya mbere ubasabe kwigizayo umunsi kandi uzawubahirize.Ba inyangamugayo imwe yanga umugayo koko.Vuga ibyo uzasubiramo,emera ibyo uzakora,hakana weruye mu cyapa ibyo utazashobora wivuga ngo “kwemera ntibibuza uwanga kwanga” cyangwa ngo “tuzareba”. Iyo uzwiho kurimanganya, kubeshya no kuba karyamyenda,utakarizwa icyubahiro mu bandi,kandi ugasuzugurwa.

Hari icyo nibagiwe? Nyunganira unyuze hano hasi mu mwanya wo gutangiramo ibitekerezo (comments) Ibuka kubigeza ku bandi umfashe kubaka sosiyeti,abantu bose babasha gusoma mu kinyarwanda.

Soma indi ngingo nanditse ifite umutwe uvuga ngo: DORE UBUSIRIMU….DORE UMUCO….DORE AMATEGEKO MBONEZAMUBANO! Umenye andi mahame aranga umuntu usirimutse. Kanda hano.

Mugire ibihe byiza,

Nitwa Hakizimana Maurice

Hakizimana Maurice ni umwarimu w’umwuga (Master MEEF/Sciences de l’Education/Sociologie) Université Catholique de Paris/Sorbonne Université,akaba yigisha mu Bufaransa.Wamukurikira kandi kuri : Facebook,Twitter na Instagram

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